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May

1-5-'18

Left Delhi. Owing to indisposition, he kept lying on his berth all through the journey, but wrote the following letter to Harilal (his eldest son):

"I had got your letter in Delhi. I wonder what I should write in reply. Man behaves according to the impulses of his nature. But it is the very 'dharma', the 'purushartha' (effort which every man as a human being should put forth) of everyone of us to gain mastery over them. Make that effort, and all your faults will be forgotten and forgiven. You state very emphatically that you have not committed any defalcation, and I will believe you, but the world will not. You must, therefore, silently bear with the world's scorn and be careful and wary in future. Try to change the world's view about you. Your boss is the world for you. Don't be afraid of having to appear in a court of law, or of its possible judgment. If you accept my advice, don't engage a pleader at all, but put all your cards on the table before the opposing lawyer.

You had with you a valuable diamond, but, with your overadventurous and impatient nature, you lost it. You are no longer a baby. It is not that you have tasted as yet only a little of the sweets and bitters of the world. If you are surfeited, retrace your steps. Never lose courage on any account. Truth itself is God. Our virtues and vices are not just dead but charged with life and they bear fruit. You have so far led a thoughtless and self-willed life, wish you turned a new leaf, and became thoughtful and restrained now.

Something really great was accomplished at Delhi in my stride. You will have some idea of it from the Press. I am too busy, but Mahadev will manage to find time to write more fully. He satisfies my need for you. But I cannot yet wrench myself from a feeling of fondness for you and from the wistful thought, 'How happy would I have been, if you were by my side in his stead ? If others had not become my sons and soothed my feelings, I would have simply died of the pain of separation from you. But without any need to dislodge them, your place with me is always vacant and waiting to be filled, if only you decide to become my son in its true sense.

Blessings, Bapu"

2-5-'18

Arrived at Nadiad in the morning. Talks about happenings in Delhi. Left for Bombay the same night.

3-5-'18

Arrived in Bombay in the morning and saw Mrs. Besant. She agreed to support Bapuji in his view regarding unconditional support to the Government in its campaign of recruitment for the army. Attended in the evening a meeting of the Congress Committee. Khaparde, Tilak and others strongly advocated the view, 'Give us swaraj and take our help'. Bapu made a touching appeal in favour of co-operation without any pre-conditions :

• "The Empire is passing through a crisis. I am taking the most

sordid view of the situation. We have stated our terms sufficiently. We need not repeat those terms. We must raise our own army and, if need be, our army will be able to defy the British Government itself for which it is being raised. Whether we help or no, they are going to raise their 5 lacs of men. Why not then anticipate them, and offer them an army of our own selection ? I, who know the trying conditions, think that I should have the whole recruiting in my own hands, and thus save our young men all the misery and hardship of which we hear so much. We ought not to trifle with the situation. The necessity for deliberate action on our part is greater now, as Shastriar said, but I will even go further. It is India that will decide the situa- tion. If India perishes, the Empire perishes. We do not mind the Empire perishing, but we do mind our country perishing. The leaders should require the peasant to leave the plough and to go to the War. This is no time for passing halting resolutions. I would suggest that, if you can share my feeling, you should decide to form a Recruiting Committee and, before it starts work, you should say to the Government that they would make the situation easy by following our recommendations. That would be business-like position. When we are on our trial, when Home Rulers are on their trial, we ought to be in earnest. I am putting before you what is surging in my breast. If you realize that our country is lost to us, and we will be under a domination, before which we will have to repeat our history (of subjecttion), we ought to be in earnest, and help our level best to save the situation."

The second resolution was about the Kaira struggle. Everyone gave Bapuji a carte blanche to pass any resolution he liked in the matter. So the resolution was framed and all the members voted for it. But just then, Sri Srinivasa Shastri raised a point of order that such an important resolution could not be passed immediately, as due notice was not given previously. The president, C. P. Ramaswamy Iyer, admitted that Shastriar's objection was technically correct since it was not possible to give a week's notice, but, he added, he was putting the resolution from the Chair. Bapu then said he wanted to withdraw the resolution under those circumstances. He repeated his request more than once, but nobody minded him and all bawled out, "We accept the resolution." With pain pictured on his face, Shastriar then got up and humbly declared, "I am sorry I cannot give my assent to the resolution." On his return home at night Bapu com-mented, "Shastriar was at his highest and best today. It was evident his heart was lacerated at having to differ, but he is a holy man and he got up to raise his voice of protest in his own honourable way." Bapu even wrote a letter to him at night:

• "Your 'No' had a real value to me. The 'A yes' had no value at

all."

"And Shastriar said, when he read the letter", reported Sri Amritlal Thakkar to us, "Only a Gandhi could write this letter."

This a noteworthy instance of one who is not only honest to himself, but can also rejoice at seeing the same virtue even in an opponent.

The mail brought us today the Viceroy's permission to publish Bapu's letter to him. I went round the city to give copies for publication to the different papers here. I had stretched myself last night on the floor of the terrace, under the open sky, and fallen asleep. Bapu woke me up, and made me sleep on a four-poster inside. This was the second visible expression of his love for me, and I was reminded of the first at Baroda station.

4-5-'18

Dictated and finished within one hour and a half the trans-lation of his letter to the Viceroy. Revised his reply1 to the Government Press note, and circulated its copies for publication. Left for Bijapur by the night train.

5-5-'18

Reached Bijapur in the afternoon. A few lawyers of Ahmednagar saw him in the train, as we were passing from Hutgi to Bijapur. They discussed the discontent that had arisen among the ryots from the Government's proposed requisitioning of their lands, for the installation of an Australian or American Company there. The lawyers showed Bapu the petition they had submitted and other relevant correspondence. "But don't you think", suggested Bapu, "that the central point is missed here (in the petition), viz., that the ryots are unjustly rob-bed of their property and that they must not be robbed for some other's benefit? " The interviewers saw a new light. Bapu advised them, "Instead of passing resolutions, the ryots must be taught to know their rights and, if they really feel that their rights are sacrificed, they must be asked to submit a monster petition to the Government. This petition must state clearly that the ryots are determined not to give up their possession, and that the Government must choose whether to send them to jail or to let them retain it. But before doing all that ? ? must be approached and what he has to say in the matter known. If his explanation is unsatisfactory, his doing behind the scene may be exposed."

A gentleman?the sub-editor of "The Maratha"?came to see Bapu to discuss with him the proposal to launch Satyagraha ___________________ 1. Reference to the Government Press-note dated 24-4-'18, which stated that no appointment of an independent tribunal in respect of the Kaira situation was called for. See Appendix I-2 for this reply.

against the Government's cancellation of the passports for England issued to the Home Rule Deputation. Bapu explained to him in the principles of Satyagraha; to wit, the Satyagrahi must be steadfast in his resolve not to accept defeat and to adhere to truth and non-violence, it should be such as can be offered by a large number of men, and no question of Satyagraha arises unless the opponent's action is brutal, tyrannical, immoral and unjust.

The Subjects Committee met at 9 p.m. The question of giving help to the Man-Power Committee also cropped up. Bapuji agreed to clarify the next morning his stand at the Delhi Conference, but while doing so, he observed,1 "If I had a blank card, I should move for a single, simple resolution. I would resist the introduction of any condition with all my might."

After 9.30 p.m. a 'Depressed Class Conference" was held. It was at the very pressing request of Shinde1 that Bapuji attended it. After many resolutions were passed, Bapuji was asked to propose a resolution late at nearly 12 midnight. It was meant to give the support of the Depressed Classes to the Congress- League Scheme, and to request the Government to give a niche to them also in their Reform Scheme. Before proposing his resolution Bapuji surveyed the audience and asked, "How many Depressed Class members are there in this Conference ? "He put the question thrice, but none stood up. Somebody at last said, "There's not a single member." The remark provoked Bapu to say in Hindi :

"What then are we doing here all this time till this late hour of 12 ? We are like parrots who repeat, 'Narayan, Narayan', (Lord, Lord) at some other's bidding without understanding what the word means. I appeal to Mr. Shinde to give up organising such Conferences and immerse himself in some solid constructive work for the Depressed Classes. It is impossible to get redemption from the sin of untouchability except by the purification of the heart. It is only intense sincerity, not put-up shows, that can achieve anything. We pass so many resolutions ___________________ 1. One of the earliest high caste champions of removal of untouchability for which he devoted his whole life.

in favour of the removal of untouchability, but with practically no results. In order to prevent the passing of a previous resolution by a unanimous vote, somebody here had got up and protested that this was an airy, unpractical Conference. I agree and say the same thing.

When, in the agenda, I read the resolution in favour of the Congress-League Scheme, I had thought 'Surely, this resolution would be supported by some Depressed Class members', but there is not even one Depressed Class member here. What can be the effect of passing that resolution at such a Conference then? What weight will it carry with Mr. Montague? I simply cannot propose this resolution. We have no right to pass it here. We must not bring it in this Conference. It is quite enough and more, if we discard pretences and become straight-forward. We no longer practise the 'varnashrama dharma' (duties pertaining to the four chief castes and the four stages of life), as enjoined by our scriptures. The Brahmin has given up his functions and duties as a Brahmin, and so has the Kshatriya (the warrior) and so the Vaishya (the businessman). And still we stick like a leech to what was never sanctioned by our religion?this untouchability ! We are not fit for Swaraj.

Men like Lord Sydenham are sure to fling at our face the question, "How are you, who are clamouring for Swaraj for your-selves, going to deal with the untouchables ?" And, in answer, we will have to hang down our heads in shame. He who demands Swaraj must give it first to others. 'He who wants equity must come with clean hands'?that is the legal maxim. I appeal to you all to close this foot-light show and, with all the sincerity of the heart, pray to God at this midnight hour that our sins may be washed off and our callousness be transformed into brotherly love."

6-5-'18

Everyone knew that Bapu was going to express this morning his views on the Delhi Conference, and was eagerly awaiting his turn to speak. Bapu declared :

• "I have committed a serious indiscretion. A friend came and

said that I was unnecessarily creating a disturbance in Bijapur which is divided into two camps. I did not know the real position. I have not come to throw the apple of discord and to accelerate the feelings of the parties. Lokamanya1 Tilak must be here to guide you and me. I am but a child of three in politics. I have yet to see, to consider and to learn things. I apologise for creating a disturbance. As I propose to put into practice the programme I have mapped out, I should not be anxious to ascertain the feelings running in all parts of India. But as you are all come here with preconceived notions, I cannot discuss my position here. I would like to exchange views and understand your feelings and deciding motives and reach the backs of your minds. But I shall prefer to come here in a calmer atmosphere, and shall only then come to steel your hearts when we are not cramped with resolutions before us. I think Mr. Kelkar2 has taken the most reasonable position, and that at this stage we must accept the Congress Committee's Resolution."

Bapu then proposed a resolution in favour of the abolition of the indentured labour system. We left Bijapur in the afternoon. He felt tired and lay down for a long time on his berth in the train.

7-5-'18

Reached Bombay in the morning. Spent the day in visits to many people. He enjoyed his meal specially today as it was prepared by the loving hands of Avantikabai. Left Bombay by the night train. A very happy letter from the Bihar Government was received in the mail today in reply to Bapu's letter re. Swami Satyadev. It was a long letter showing reasons for the Swami's internment, giving details about his lectures which the Government regarded as objectionable and telling Bapu what ________________ 1. Loka?People; manya?respected or revered. Lokmanya (respected by the people) was the title conferred on Tilak Maharaj by the people, in appreciation of his services. 2. Editor of Lokamanya Tilak's paper, 'Maratha'.

the Government proposed to do about him now. It ended with the statement that the Lieutenant Governor of Bihar was thankful to Bapu for keeping the Swami under his control.

8-5-'18

Nadiad. Talks. Wrote letters.

9-5-'18

I wrote a letter to Bapu and sent it through Vallabhbhai, who brought back to me Bapu's immediate reply :

"Bhaishri Mahadev,

I never dreamt that you would misinterpret my proposal and consider as a vote of censure against you what I had said solely out of my deep faith and confidence in you. You are so entwined around me that I did anticipate that it would be a wrench and a shock to you to have to go away to Champaran. But it passes my comprehension how you could even imagine that in making that proposal I played a trick on you because I considered you unfit for the work here and wanted to get rid of you. On the contrary, I thought of you for the work there, as I had considered you the only fit person who could fulfil all my hopes. I also believed that the work which Durga would be expected to do there was not beyond her capacity. Perhaps it was an over-estimate but that was my view. Now let me hasten to tell you that a your fears about my estimate of your worth are entirely imaginary and baseless. Far from it, it was my high esteem for the abilities of both of you that was at the back of my suggestion of sending you there. I had already spoken to Ravjibhai and Devdas of the inconvenience I would have to suffer owing to the consequent lack of your assistance. You have established your position here so well that you have become almost irreplaceable. There was no exaggreration but simple truth in what I wrote to Polak about you. I have chosen you for my colleague because I found in you just the right man for my political work, and for your efficiency in other matters and for your character. You have not disappointed me at all.

And what is more is the fact that you prepare khichri (rice and lentil cooked together) for me with such inordinate love ! More when we meet."

10-5-'18

Arrived in Ahmedabad at night.

11-5-'18

I received a chastening sermon for my foolish letter of the 9th: "I had never imagined that you would misunderstand me so woefully. You have done me a grave injustice. You have condemned me, a person reputed to be the bravest in India, as a coward. Could I not have told you plainly, what you imagined I let you know in a roundabout crooked way ? You couldn't see the simple fact that I had prepared myself to undergo the sacrifice which your absence would entail on me. I was quite certain that you would succeed at any place where I sent you and in any kind of work I entrusted you with. I had suggested your name under the belief that you possessed that all round fitness. Your letter only proved that you did not."

"When you said that Narhari couldn't be spared but I could be," I faltered, "I felt I was hardly needed here."

Bapu: "That's true. The Ashram School needs Narhari. How could he be sent away? And for me, it is not quite impossible to do without a secretary. I would certainly be inconvenienced, but I might carry on. No other person could be your substitute in the amount and quality of your output, but as I am not unaccustomed to do my work single-handed, your absence would not bring it to a standstill. Only, with you to help me, I could put in double work-and that sacrifice I had made myself ready to undergo."

Wrote letters for the mail in the afternoon. Visited the city in the evening.

There was an important letter to Miss Esther Farring in the mail today:

• "My dear Esther,

I have your letter. I shall?we shall?look forward to your coming to the Ashram during X'mas. The main buildings will then have been ready and the weather will be delightful.

I hope you have read my letter to the Viceroy, as also my letter in reply to Mr. Pratt's speech. They contain in the briefest form my views on Government and the philosophy of life, and the one to the Viceroy showed in the vividest form the view I take of the law of love and suffering. 'Passive Resistance' expresses the idea in the crudest form. Indeed, I dislike the use of the phrase 'a weapon of the weak' for it. It totally misrepresents the law of love. Love is the epitome of strength. Love flows the freeliest only when there is entire absence of fear. Punishments of the loved ones are like balm to the soul.

Will you not try an absolute fast for your liver? You may drink boiled water copiously and, if that is not enough, you may drink orange-juice diluted with water. If you feel weak and faint, lie in bed, better still, take a cold hipbath, i.e., sit in a tub with your legs and the upper part of the body out of water. It is most invigorating. There is nothing like fasting for liver-complaints.

Yours sincerely, Bapu"

12-5-'18

Ahmedabad. The Gujarat Sabha passed last night the resolution giving unconditional support to the recruitment campaign.

13-5-'18

Meeting at Dhundhakua. Straight back to Ahmedabad from there. Ba and Durga accompanied Bapu in the trip. Durgadas Advani came last night.

14-5-'18

We put up at Narhari's house in Kathlal. Bapu had a sun-stroke. Lay down the whole day in a wet-sheet pack.

15-5-'18

Bapu was a little displeased with me for sending to "The Bombay Chronicle" my report of his speech at Dhundhakua without first showing it to him. That was his reaction to a 'bad' report sent by Khandwala. There were some noteworthy letters sent in today's mail.

To Dr. (Pranjivandas) Mehta :

"What shall I write about the Kaira struggle ? It has a very remarkable significance. It passes everybody's comprehension how such a big fight could be waged with only a paltry 2 or 3 thousand rupees by way of travelling expenses. About twenty five thousand rupees must have been collected, but they were all returned to the respective donors and I have to say 'no' to many an offer of monetary help still coming. If I accepted contributions, the spirit of the fight would be vitiated, immorality would creep in, and the people instead of rising higher would sink lower. Refusal to take any amount from outside has saved me from all these dire consequences, and enabled me to keep the battle on a high moral plain. The whole of India understands and backs the struggle, but Sri Shastriar does not, and that is a matter of regret for me. But in course of time he too will support it. He is a man of high principles and I am not worried over him. At least to my mind the struggle is perfectly righteous. I have not a shred of doubt about it."

Dabholkar's letter : He is opposed to the Resolution on unconditional co-operation with the Government in its recruitment campaign. Unasked boons, he says, may be true of heaven but not of this sordid earth, and, therefore, putting forth our demand as an essential condition is a must. Even after reading Bapu's published letter to the Viceroy thrice, he scents 'policy' in it.

Reply :

"I have your letter. I thank you for putting your views so frankly before me. I wonder how you could discern, 'policy' in it, when I wrote it in all honesty. Every word in it is the expression of my sincere belief. You are right in summing up my view as one in favour of self-immolation. I do believe that if we can offer the voluntary sacrifice of lakhs of men, Swaraj is ours this very day. If that letter cannot show you how such selfimmolation can bring that result, I cannot succeed through this letter in making you see the point. I, therefore, request you to read and re-read that letter and ponder over every word of it till you understand it. I assure you the effort will not be wasted. I have not written that letter in haste. It has been finalised after serious efforts at perfection in thought and language, and has been written in all sincerity and for the one object of serving the beloved land. That it does not quite clearly express what I really mean, or is even ambiguous, shows to my mind my own defectiveness to that extent in my mortification. If the country understands properly the spirit of my plan for Swarajand implements it fully, then, I am quite certain, it means the advent of Swaraj automatically and a thousand other achievements besides. To say 'Give us Swaraj first and then we'll fight for you', seems at least to me want of proper understanding of what Swaraj really means. I do not consider that I am morally bound to put before the public all the letters I write to the Viceroy, because I am a representative of the people. In the course of my long public career as a leader, there have been many achievements, which I consider as valuable and yet which have remained, and will always remain, hid from the limelight. My first letter to the Viceroy was intended solely for him. Knowing him to be a gentleman, I poured forth before him in all friendliness several deep sentiments of my heart, which I can never expose to the public gaze. The courteous but bitter language I used in it would do a lot of harm, if the people came to read it. I have already published from the letter all that was possible. The second letter to him was about what I proposed to do and, as compared with the first, there is nothing of any value in it."

Hanumantrao's letter : His request to Bapu to answer the bitter attack of "The Hindu" on Shastriar's speech at the Viceroy's Conference. "The Hindu" said in substance that the speech was worthless, and that the country did not recognise Sri. Shastriar as its leader.

To him Bapu wrote :

• "The Hindu" comments on Mr. Shastriar's speech are damnable,

and I think the best answer to them is not to notice them. Mr. Kasturi Ayangar is a man who is not to be convinced by any appeal to reason or sense of justice. He has his own notions and sticks to them with an obstinacy. I have rarely seen in any other man. Those who know Mr. Shastriar are not affected by "The Hindu" comments. Those for whom Mr. Kasturi Ayangar's word is gospel truth will listen to no correction. His (Shastriar's) unapproachable character and his scholarly attainments may be trusted to take care of themselves, and to bear down in the end the obsession of his bitterest enemies. I think Mr. Shastriar will give a good account of himself when anyone else is weighed in the balance and found wanting, and I think he knows this and he is supremely happy in the consciousness of it. You and I, therefore, have no cause to feel perturbed over the vagaries of Mr. Kasturi Ayangar or for that matter of anybody else. But all of us have to conspire and, if possible, compel him to look after his body which, I hold, is not beyond repair."

The general meeting of the "Gujarat Sabha" was held at night. I could not attend it. It passed the resolution of unconditional co-operation with the Government.

On his return from the meeting Bapu took Khandwala to task for his 'bad' reporting. He made in passing some significant observations on newspaper-reporting : 'Is that what you call covering a movement ? What do you do all the day long ? You get plenty of time to prepare lively reports. Day-to-day reports must look like a running commentary. There must be a linking up of the second day's report with the first, of the third with the second and so on, so as to make of all of them an interesting chapter in history. I forget the name?Russel probably but his reports on "The Expedition To Peking"

were so picturesque that the readers used to be thrilled. Then there was Edwin Arnold who has written letters entitled. "Japan By Land And Sea". They too are as charming. You have no reason to believe that you cannot be another Russel or Arnold. They were not born with their skill in the presentation of facts. It was effort that made them great. To be true to yourself and the public, you must write something like this for tomorrow's despatch :

• "I am sorry to have been carried away by a stray report and to

have sent you a letter, which should have led you to frame such an extravagant headline as, "Growing Estrangement between the Riyat and the Sarkar."

The next day he himself prepared for Khandwala a draft on similar lines.

16-5-'18 Returned to Nadiad in the morning. Left for Sandesar from there. A splendid meeting. About 2000 men and 500 women were present. Wonderful reception and Bapu's equally delightful speech in response. But we were not present. It is certain that we miss something glorious?either an event or a speech?whenever we commit some folly. 17-5-'18 Ahmedabad. Left by the night train for Champaran. We?Durga and myself?had a fleeting meeting at the Station. Then she went to Navsari and I to Champaran. 18-5-'18 In the train. Before reaching Bayana station, he wrote two letters in ink, one to Maffey:

• "In full confidence that the request contained in my letter of

the 29th will be accepted, I am busy making recruiting preparations. But I shall not commence work before I have your reply." The other to Maganlalbhai on the greatness and grandeur of love. No copy could be made. 19-5-'18 In the train. Malaviyaji saw us at Allahabad. I was forced to take a bath, as he made someone pour a whole pitcher of water

over me. When Bapu got into the train, he asked me, "Have you got the water-tank filled ?" That idea had not struck me. "Must I have to remind you of even such little things ? You ought to anticipate our travelling needs. The people here are serviceable, and a word from you would have saved us this inconvenience. Whenever I get out of the train, you must see to it that our needs for the onward journey are provided for. This is the first lesson you must learn." I kept silent. Reached Bankipur at night.

20-5-'18

The next day we started for Motihari. On the way to it, as we were getting on board the steamer after detraining, I received a lecture for being late in coming to our starting railway station. "What did you do after 5 in the morning ?"After disembarking we had to take another train. Bapu had a nap in it. We reached Motihari at 3.30 p.m. The public rushed towards him like an invading army, but it was a quiet informal reception. The evening was spent in talks with various persons including the Swami. The whole attitude of the Swami has changed. His behaviour showed veneration and devotion for Bapu. Even for me, his former indifference and neglect have been replaced by great respect and regard.

21-5-'18

Rajendrababu1 came from Patna. Bapu's talks with Gorakhbabu in his presence.. Bapu saw Haycock also who told him :

• "You have, I think, come to wind up your business in

Champaran."

Bapu replied :

• "It would be wound up with my death."

Bapu also told him that he was going to start a recruiting campaign for the Army. In the afternoon, he explained to the Swami the import of his fast at Ahmedabad and the distinguishing features of the struggle there. I related to the Swami _________________ 1. Dr. Rajendraprasad, who was afterwards honoured as the first President of the Indian Republic.

Bapu's achievement at the Delhi Conference. Rajendrababu unburdened his heart before me at night. We started for Bhitiharva at the small hour of 2 a.m. 22-5-'18 Arrived in Bhitiharva. On the 21st Bapu had written a letter to Dr. Dev in which, referring to his (Dr. Dev's) completing the construction of the school-building at Bhitiharva within a very short time, he had said, "I have been hearing from people here the story of your exploit". We reached Bhitiharva in the morning. Bapu had long talks with Dr. Dev and others. The sight of the school-building delighted Bapu's heart very much. Talk with the school children. He tried to impress upon their minds the need for this triple cleanliness: "In order to be good boys and girls, our body must be clean, our heart must be clean and our clothes must be clean". Bapu quoted these two couplets about Bharat from Tulsidas's Ramayana, and asked the teacher to explain them to the children :

ãäÔã¾ããÀã½ã ¹ãÆñ½ã ãä¹ã¾ãîÓã ¹ãîÀ¶ã Öãñ¦ã  ?ã¶ã½ãì ¶ ã ¼ãÀ¦ã  ?ã?ãñ ã ½ãìãä¶ã½ã¶ã  ?ãØã½ã  ?ã½ã ãä¶ã¾ã½ã Ôã½ãª½ã ãäºãÓã½ã ºãÆ ¦ã  ?ããÞãÀ¦ã  ?ã?ãñ ãã ªì:?ã ªãÖ ªããäÀª ª½¼ã ªîÓã¶ã Ôãì?ãÔã ãä½ãÔã  ?ã¹ãÖÀ¦ã ?ã?ãñ ã ?ã?ãäÊã?ã?ãÊã ¦ãìÊãÔããè Ôãñ Ôã?ãä¶Ö Öãä? Àã½ã Ôã¶ã½ãì ?ã  ?ã?À¦ã  ?ã?ãñ ãã

His ardent love for Ram and Sita Failed his heart and mind; And Bharat performed tapasya1 Of the sternest kind, Strictly observed the vows of Yama2, Niyama3, Shama4, Dama5 ; And made it easy for our race To see Ram face to face. What else but Bharat's birth could save This Tulsi a sinner grave From the world of woe and squalor and sin And Grace for him could win ?

______________ 1. Mortification; 2 & 3, rules of behaviour for an aspirant; 4 Serenity 5 self-control.

He explained the genesis of the school, and exhorted the children to be like their guru, who loved to sacrifice his personal interests and was not ashamed to do manual labour, though a respectable lawyer himself.

At night Bapu told me, "Those chhandas (a special form of couplet) of Tulsidas are sublime. Did you read them carefully ? I can never read Ayodhyakand (a section in Tulsidas's Ramayana, dealing with the banishment of Rama) without tears.

Then he talked of his proposal to have a Central Office at Motihari : "We don't possess even a building there, but we must have not only a building but an extensive ground around it of our own. You know, I suppose, of a cathedral. There are separate sections for every department and, as the work expands, new structures are built. West Minister Abbey dates from the era of Alfred the Great, but new rooms and wings have been constantly added, and the Abbey is an ever-expanding institution. That must happen to our Central Office. One of the two? either Rajendrababu or Brijkishorebabu?must prepare himself to stay on the premises." To Gorakhbabu he said, "You must take an oath to buy the land for the Office before the month ends." This seemed to me a too fantastic demand and I grinned. But he laughed back and retorted : "All my deeds have been exactly like that. They look absurd at first." What I had felt was, 'What's this tall talk of our own land and building and continuous expansion, when even the office-rent is so hard to find !' But his silencer and the result turned the tables against me, and it was I who proved myself craven-hearted and a doubting Thomas in the end. We reached Betia at night.

23-5-'18

From Betia to Motihari, where we arrived in the afternoon. There were two long letters in the mail from Andrews about the arrest of Pearson (his friend and co-worker for India's cause and also a Professor in Tagore's Shantiniketan). All his efforts to get him released had failed, and Andrews wrote in exasperation and annoyance:

• "I had one of the greatest disappointments of past years. I

went to the Viceroy and he gave me a blank refusal; he would not make any inquiry etc. etc."

"I saw Maffey and he spoke at once of you, and spoke of the difficulty in knowing quite how to answer your letter. He said everything has been made 'provincial': "I have written to Lord Willingdon, etc. etc." I told him that I had seen some of the leaders in Bengal and believed they were very keen to have you there. Then he said that you were a very difficult man to get on with, and he was afraid that some point would crop up and there would be a split-up. I need not tell you that my back was up and I defended you?I hope quite quietly and kindly?but it seemed to show me where the hesitation lay. He instanced Kaira and smiled at the thought of your calling it a war-work. Then I was up in arms again and told him all about it, and he was shaken when I told him Lord Willingdon's posi- tion; but he ended : "Well, all I can say is, if I had been the Collector and someone had come in and interfered with my assessment. I would have resisted him to the death."

"The Viceroy was quite irritable about my Mohammedan suggestions, which were very, very moderate and quietly worded?much quieter than the paper I showed you?but they seemed to get his back up and he said, 'We must get on with the war'?which seems now a panacea for all stupidity and lack of vision and neglect of hard, solid thinking. He did not mention you at all."

"This last week --- thinking of Willie (person) --- has been a great strain and I have been feeling it very much."

Bapu's reply :

• "I did not feel moved when I read of Willie's arrest. I

sympathise too with the Viceroy's feelings. Why should he be called upon to investigate matters of this nature when there is a deadly war going on ? Willie and we should meekly suffer

There is no principle at stake in Willie's case. There is no question of race-prejudice and none of public feeling. Some must be content to be imprisoned for their views or actions. What is necessary is to correspond with Willie. He will fight his way to freedom, if he needs it. To be anxious about him is to do him injustice. I feel sure that he is happy where he is. (I think that public agitation is unnecessary). If you feel like me, you would write a manly letter to the Viceroy for worrying him. I sometimes feel that many of these Englishmen who go through the terrible strain of war without collapsing must be yogis. They would be fit for moksha (salvation), if their yoga was employed for a better cause."

For the next mail he wrote three letters?to Macpherson for the Swamiji's case, to Reade and to Khorshedbehn. Left for Badharwa at 3 p.m., but it turned out to be a waste of trouble since cholera had suddenly broken out there. We returned at 11. p.m.

The purchase of land (for the Central Office) at Motihari was settled and even the preparation for laying the foundation begun. Bapu felt extremely happy at the news.

24-5-'18

Wrote a letter in the morning for the transfer of the property to the names of the Trustees and for permission to build on it. There was some talk of a need for giving baksheesh for both the purposes. Bapu said that one of the conditions for being a Trustee was that, in case there was any trouble, every Trustee must set up a camp for his stay and thus fix himself on the land, go ahead with the construction of the building and, as often as it was pulled down, build it again and again, but must never yield to bribery or pressure. The Trust-deed was then written.

A memorable letter to Hanumantrao :

• "What I want you to do is not to sever your connection with

the Society (Servants of India Society), but remaining in the Society do the Hindi work. I would like Mr. Shastriar (the President) to permit you to go to Allahabad, stay there a year and learn Hindi fairly well, then return to Madras and side by side with your other work spread a knowledge of Hindi among the Telegu people. The fact of your having studied Hindi will enlarge the scope of your work and enable you, if the occasion arose, to work among the masses outside the Madras Presidency. I do not know whether you have noticed it. I have. There is almost an unbridgeable gulf between the Dravidians and the other Indians. The shortest and the most effective bridge is undoubtedly the Hindi language. English can never take its place. When Hindi becomes the common language among the cultured classes, the Hindi vocabulary will soon filter down to the masses. There is something undefinable about Hindi, which makes it the easiest language to learn, and somehow or other there is a license taken about Hindi grammar, such as I have not known to be taken about any other language. The result is that the learning of Hindi becomes largely a matter of memory only. Hence do I say that for doing national work a knowledge of Hindi is an absolute necessity. What can be better than that a member of the Society would give himself a training in Hindi ? Mr. Gokhale once told me that he wanted a knowledge of Hindi to be obligatory on the part of all the members, and that he wanted Hindi to be the language spoken at the Society's meetings. He added that the Tamilians and especially Mr. Shastriar presented the greatest difficulty. He was too old to learn it.

You seem to think of the Satyagrahashram as something apart from the Society. But I do not. During the last days of Mr. Gokhale's life on this earth, his wish was that I should open a branch in Gujarat, and bring to life a province which appeared to be politically dead. It fills me with pride to know that I have played a humble part in carrying out the programme. It is a matter not of much moment that the Satyagrahashram cannot be recognised as a branch. The work is there. In so far as it is good, in my estimation the credit is the Society's, the failures are due to my limitations and need not be shared by the Society. When, in the fullness of time, I have got over my limitations,

the Ashram will merge in the Society. Till then, even if you wanted to come to the Ashram, I would not admit you except as a loan from the Society. So you see that in thinking of you as a candidate for learning Hindi, I have not even conceived the possibility of your severance from the Society ?

Yours sincerely, M. K. Gandhi"

My diary-notes have gone irregular since we left Champaran. Events that happened in the interval:

At Patna station a stranger fanned Bapuji for a very long time, who then fell asleep in the train. The stranger got down at his destination without taking with him his thin cotton mattress, as Bapuji's feet lay on it, and he was afraid lest Bapuji might wake up in his attempt to slide the mattress from under his feet. From his talk with us before he alighted, we suppose he is a low grade servant in the police department and of very ordinary means. When Bapu got up, he felt deeply concerned and exclaimed, "Seehow many a Sir Gibby can be found among men of no note who render silent service !" I too was really moved. "I can't remember to have done one single act of such a really selfless service in all my life," I said to myself.

But I am mentioning this incident to show the bewildering variety of human nature. We were talking about the mattress in the morning and a Marwari passenger who quietly listening. When he was about to get down at the Mughalsarai station, he said, "Why not give it (the mattress) away to me ? You don't need it, I am sure !" Bapu was emphatic in reply, "Never. The mattress shall be sent back to the owner."

Bapu got into a reminiscent mood. The case that took him to South Africa called for an expert knowledge in casting accounts. "When I was listening to the opposing lawyer speaking of this item credited and that debited, I shuddered inwardly and wondered how was I going to be able to fathom the mysteries of accountancy ! I spent the night tossing in bed with the same persistent worry, and made a grim resolve to learn up all the intricacies of the subject. I asked my client to provide me with two accountants. Whenever I couldn't understand any point, I would not mind trying the patience of my teacher and would put my difficulty before him not once, but twice, thrice, and as often as necessary till I was completely clear about it. In the end I could place my case before the judge so well that I won."

After a glance at the construction of our compartment he said, "Mahadev, I would have become one of the most proficient mechanicians, if I had cared to. Whatever object I chance to look at, my eye immediately perceives it inside out, and I can detect the flaws and merits of the mechanism. I go so far as to believe that, if I had begun medical practice, I would have risen to the topmost rank in India, the best of doctors would have taken down their hats before me, and my example would have stopped many doctors from malpractices. Even as matters stand at present, I don't think anybody could beat me in diagnosis. All the doctors to whom I have entrusted my cases have been astounded at the correctness of my diagnosis and my careful nursing. I did intend to go in for the doctor's profession, but father objected. "Not out line, that dirty groveling business?handling of dead bodies", he said, I had even begun studying anatomy, biology and physiology, but the daily sight of the dissection of live frogs turned me away from the study. I feel it is not very necessary, even for the higher study of the science, to dissect living creatures."

Then, after some time, he earnestly pressed upon me to take from the Ashram coffers full compensation for my money stolen in Bombay. He pleaded in a variety of ways to show to me the propriety of accepting the amount in order to remove my qualms. But my heart cried out against accepting the money. So he dropped the matter and I was saved.

As we were returning from the lecture, which Bapu had delivered at Patna the other night, I had a talk with Mazhar-al- Huq in which I had expressed my doubts about re-incarnation. Referring to that statement Bapu said, "Mahadev, I never imagined you were that sort of man. I for one, would not call a man a Hindu, if he does not believe in re-incarnation."

"Call me a non-Hindu or a Christian or whatever you like", I answered : "but why should I hide what I honestly feel ? It's a question of conviction. If I can be satisfied about the truth of the theory, I would become a believer".

As I began to give reasons for my disbelief, Bapu cut me short and said, "There is no need to argue. Don't you see that every moment millions of beings are born and millions die ? That itself suggests that there must be re-incarnation."

I submitted, "Could any man ever think of becoming a horse or a horse a man, according to the dictum ¾ãã ½ããä¦ã: Ôãã Øããä¦ã: (As a man thinketh, so he becometh after death), which is one of the props of the theory of re-incarnation ?" He replied, "But that's not quite to the point. Just the same, Anna Kingsford used to say that she felt that many Frenchmen would be born as tigers after their deaths. What does that statement show ?"

"Nothing," I affirmed; "if it shows anything, it only means that Anna Kingsford got a severe shock at the wicked deeds of those people?and she expressed her feelings of shame and disgust in strong language." Bapu kept gravely silent. At last I told him. "I will try to believe in the theory". He then said, "He who does not believe in it cannot have any real faith in the regeneration of fallen souls. At least that man who wants to save society ought to possess that faith." "To that extent I suppose the theory to be true," I replied, "and when I am fully convinced, I will accept it whole-heartedly." Then I showed him the dialogue between Gottfried and Christopher from " John Christopher Vol. II" and said, "Is this not what you want of me-'to have faith, to observe, and to pray ?' He said, 'Yes'. Then bringing to the talk to a close he said, "You must read 'Life Beyond Death' by Arnold."

28-5-'18

We arrived at Nadiad. Stayed for two days. Spent most of the time in sundry correspondence. Delivered beautiful speeches at two places. Both of them have been published.

30-5-'18

Went to Ahmedabad. In consultation with Pragji it was decided that I should persuade Durga (Mrs. Mahadevbhai) to agree to our going to Champaran. It was also fixed that Mr. and Mrs. Pragji should accompany us. I gave the message to him at night which I was entrusted with, and explained to him the truth of the saying ?ã? ã½ãã¦ãìÀã¥ãã⠶㠼ã¾ãâ ¶ã Ë??ãã ý (The man consumed with lust has no fear and is lost to all sense of shame).